What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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