I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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