Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
