One girl and one boy is just not enough.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
