I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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