yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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