I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Randomize
