He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
