I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Randomize
