What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
