i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
