ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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