I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I need moral support for this bender
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
