You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
This is not my ceiling
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Randomize
