So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Vodka?
Forever.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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