i think my tv is drunk
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
