p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Of course I have a pirate flag
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
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