yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
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