Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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