Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
