I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
