She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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