Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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