So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
