All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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