She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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