it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
