she was so not down for the gang bang
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
