Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
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