I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Randomize
