Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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