FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize
