it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Randomize
