and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Randomize
