Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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