none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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