Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize