Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
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