Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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