i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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