I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
