Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am

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(970): View more from Colorado

she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener

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(612): View more from Minnesota

I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.

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(903): View more from Texas

Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me

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(678): View more from Georgia

i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade

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(678): View more from Georgia

Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.

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(360): View more from Washington

Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.

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(206): View more from Washington

Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?

(1-206): View more from Washington

Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.

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(989): View more from Michigan

R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm

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