that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
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