well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Randomize
