so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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