'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
