yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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