Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
