my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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