i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
