just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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