How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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